… as you would have them do unto you.
The Golden Rule.
A good guide when you are practicing career kindness, right?
But is there a better guide? Yes.
The Platinum Rule.
“Huh?!” I hear some of you groaning. “I’ve got all I can do to try and practice the golden rule … and now you’re piling on some platinum rule thing that I’ve never even heard of? Why should I make the extra effort?”
Because it matters.
Those of us in the executive and career coaching business certainly can attest to this fact. For the platinum rule says something like:
Do unto others …
... as they would have done unto them.
Or, as Dr. Tony Alessandra, The Platinum Rule’s initiator, might simply say: “Treat others in the way they like to be treated.”
That’s right. Different strokes for different folks.
Consider the differences in how you might relate to each of these folks:
- Bill is an introvert; he processes his thoughts better silently, before he speaks. Sandy is an extrovert; she needs to engage in dialog in order to hear her own words spoken so that she can better process her thoughts.
- Tina is task-oriented and can be annoyed if you don’t get right to the point, if a process is inefficient because it involves too many interpersonal niceties. Sam is people-oriented and can be hurt if you don’t first spend some time relating to his and others’ perspectives and feelings.
- Josh has a higher need for affection – he is motivated when someone gives him personal praise for his contribution. Wanda has a higher need for affiliation – she is motivated when she sees her contribution making a difference to the team. Lester has a higher need for control – he is motivated by making a leadership or influencing contribution.
Imagine how much more effective your career kindness (or other professional endeavors) would be if you did an even better job keeping in mind the other person’s feelings, motivations, and communication preferences.
Want to find out even more about The Platinum Rule?
Well, Dr. Tony Alessandra is an internationally respected speaker, coach, and co-author of “The Platinum Rule” text. It’s on my bookshelf. And, a quick link to one of his web pages which will give you a primer is: http://www.alessandra.com/abouttony/aboutpr.asp. Tony is also known for helping to maximize the effectiveness of this principle by combining it with a version of the DISC assessment, for all of you Jungian and Marston fans.
So, the next time you are ready to practice some career kindness, ask yourself what the other person would want and, as important, how they would want it.
Specifically, you might ask yourself:
- What motivates or de-motivates them?
- How do they like to be treated?
- Are they more task or people oriented?
- Are they more extroverted or introverted?
- How are they feeling right now?
- What causes them stress?
- Do they need more control, affection, or affiliation?
- What communication venue and style do they prefer?
- What gets them excited?
- How do they seem to best relate to other people?
You’ll be glad you did.
And so will they.
Practice some career kindness today.